Ryan McDermott – Staff Writer

There are few questions that are still left unanswered to mankind. Hamburgers or hotdogs? Paper or plastic? Shorts or jorts? However, one of the most difficult age-old questions that has stumped humanity for centuries, and tore numerous families apart. Pancakes or Waffles?

First things first, I take this kind of stuff seriously, so don’t think that this is some kind of sick joke. Now, there are people who argue on both sides of this debate, but the side I am on is obviously pancakes. If you are on the side of waffles, I am not sorry at all. You obviously lack common sense and the ability to make a rational decision.

Who doesn’t feel a little badass after taking down a towering stack of hot cakes? I know I do, and if you don’t, then from the wise words of WWE legend Chris Jericho, “You’re a stupid idiot.”

I mean seriously! Who has ever said, “Yeah, I just ate a pretty hefty stack of waffles!” I’ll tell you who, nobody, and let’s be honest nothing good has come out of Belgium since Dr. Evil. Not to mention the fact that waffles are damn near impossible to cut through! I may be a tad bit biased in this situation considering that I have had a few unfortunate run-ins with the cafeteria waffle iron.

The point is, you can’t really screw up a pancake. It, in my opinion, is a staple of any breakfast. They are a gift from the Breakfast-Food-Gods themselves. So, to all of the pancakes out there, I just want to let you know that we appreciate you.